Scheemers

Since Nadine abandoned us on this cold Sunday morning to go work at a walk-in clinic, I charged the troops with coming up with a "legitimate" malady that could get us in to see the nurse practitioner. I set the ground rules, we had to come up with a condition that would convince the receptionist that we all had to see Nadine, but we would pretend we didn't know she was there.
So, Sam got things kicked off. He suggested that we all got splinters when our gloves fell off and scraped the deck by accident. We would be sitting in the waiting room picking at our fingers and making pained faces! I countered whether it would seem believable that we all got splinters at once?
Up next was Morgan. This one's good. She said we should present with frostbite. When pressed for details, she said "we can all go outside naked and roll around in the snow". I weighed in that such a plan might be a little extreme. Besides, who knows what parts would get "frostbitten"!
Finally, Jack had an idea. Typical. He suggested that we all took the wrong combination of medicines and that gave us all very stinky gas.
I responded to the group by letting them know that as much as I loved mom, I wasn't prepared to suffer the level of pain and humiliation required to carry out their plans.
We'll keep thinking...